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Biting

Full Name: Anna Colton

Questions:

Jen and Barb,
My son got in trouble for biting another boy in kindergarten. The teacher thinks I don’t discipline him enough at home (!!!). Advice?

Answer:

Do you discipline him enough at home? What did the other boy do to your son? If this is a one time incident, I would assume that there is a story here and that a good talking to and some sort of consequence could fix it. If it is something that happens often, however, you may want to talk to a professional.

jen

Answer:

Biting is tough. My daughter India use to bite her sister Soraya when she would get mad. One time she bit her so bad that she started bleeding. Lucky I guess she never did it to kids at school. I tried yelling, taking toys away, go to room by yourself and holding out her arm and allowing her sister the opportunity to bite her back (which never happened). Then one day I explained that you could go to jail for that it is called “assault.” You can’t touch other people. I told her if she was frustrated at someone she needed to yell or go take a break but we are not allowed to touch other people without their saying it is ok. Then one day it just stopped, I think she was around 4. Our parenting expert, Betsy Brown Braun, has great advice on this (check out the episode with her called “Tired of Playing Referee to Your Children?”). The one thing I am sure of is you will not have a 7 year old that bites!

Barb

Baby cry to sleep

Full Name: Sue Weller
Question:
My daughter is 5 months old and has been sleeping 10 hours a night for 2 months. She just started waking up at 1am crying. Her doctor told me to just let her cry. I’m scared. What did you do?

Answer:
I am not a doctor, but if a baby is crying, I would go hold her or put her in the bed with me. I am sure this is not what “they” say to do, but my kids are now 6 and 7 and I cherish every night they slept in my bed (I was exhausted, but it was heaven).

Jen

Answer:
I never let my babies cry themselves to sleep. I think it is mean and dangerous. They clearly need something or they wouldn’t be crying (that’s their way of talking). They need to feel secure and that security is obtained through holding them, love, and affection. The whole notion of treating babies like adults is ridiculous. I don’t want to sleep in the bed by myself (well sometimes I do) so why should a baby? They just came out of your nice warm tummy only to be put into some cold crib. Unfortunately, I have heard many stories of parents using the “cry method” only to find something happened to the baby. I would never take that chance. At the very least, watch the monitor or stand by the door to make sure they are ok and have gone back to sleep. The one thing you can be sure is the routine constantly changes so don’t get to use to it!

barb

Classes with Your Kids

Full Name: Gwen Schaumloffel
Questions:
Hey Jen and Barb,
When did you start classes with your kids? Is 6 months too early?

Answer:
6 months is kind of early for kids, but not too early for you! Sometimes it is nice to meet other Moms and connect. Plus, the class certainly couldn’t hurt. I found once my kids were crawling that the classes were more beneficial for them, but that is just my experience.

jen

Answer:
You can never start classes too early. I started my girls at 6 months with a gym class twice a week and a “Music Together” class once a week (you can look up Music Together to see where they teach in your area, it is a theory out of Princeton University). Not only are classes great for your child to be around other kids their age it also lets you know what milestones you child is (or should be) hitting. The best part of classes is it makes you get ready and get out of the house and meet other moms who are going through a similar experience. Jen and I actually met in one of these classes when our kids were around 2 – that friendship and sense of community saved me. Just you and a baby can make for a very long day so get to those classes and watch the day fly by!

You can also check out our episode “How to pick Classes for Your Child.”

barb

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