What Do You Do When Your Kids Leave The Nest?
I hope that you are feeling more happier now browneyed lady, and have been able to adapt a little bit to life without your daughter. I feel for you. I only have one son, and I don’t think I have recovered yet from the fact that he turned 18 and left home for University. I was in a true state of shock. The first year wasn’t too bad, as he came home regularly (with washing) and then during the second year he found himself a girlfriend, and didn’t come home quite as often. I noticed that in the second year, from the age of 20, the boy was no longer, he was growing up and becoming more independent. By the third year, visits were infrequent, partly because of course work etc. I wanted him to go to University to be able to experience the life, but I don’t think I fully realised how much it would hit me.
We have always travelled as a famiy, or just the two of us, and I love to visit new places, and learn about different people and cultures, and my son has always been part of it. I am finding it hard now that he has finished Uni that he wants to stay and find work in the area that he went to Uni, and the fact that after this year maybe he will no longer want to travel with us. It is so hard to let go, but I know that I am going to have to. I work, Iand I do some relief work with people with learning difficulties, etc, so I am not sat at home brooding all day. He wants to join the Police and we were hoping he would stay home until he could get in and save some money by living at home doing other work until such time. It’s so strange but I think I could cope better if he joined the forces or something, knowing that this would still be his home, or went travelling round the world with friends.
Hello remember all is well, you may be having a hard time right now, but I can assure you it will get better. You have to remember what your dreams and goals were before you had children, and go after it. Find some time to seek God’s direction and he will help you through this trying time. It will get better you’ll see. At least you can still see your daughter, I had two children a boy and a girl, my son is no longer with me, but my daughter is. She lives in another part of TN, but I can talk with her and visit if need be, but I have learned to focus more on the things that interest me the most, and I have foud out that it fills the void when it comes to the empty nest syndrome. Wishing you the best, you’ll find what you need to fill that void I’m sure of it. Be Blessed
Hello Browneyed Lady!
First of all, I am so impressed that your daughter and her boyfriend were able to buy a house. At that age, I was living pay check to pay check and depending on my parents. Wow! And it means a lot that they are choosing to live to close to you.
I do want to comment about your depression. You may want to find someone to talk to about that. There are therapists that work on sliding scale if money is an issue. There are wonderful experts that can either help you talk through your issues, or even prescribe medication if they feel as though that is the route. Thank you so much for sharing your story and good luck with everything. Jen
I can’t imagine what it will be like when my kids leave the house. Everything we do as moms is about giving to our children and our family. I have no doubt I will share the depression you are feeling right now. I wish I had some magic words that could make it better for you. It is so hard because as parents we want to raise strong independent children than can enjoy happy healthy lives but that also means they don’t need us as like they used to. I know my mom went back to college when I left the house and then started volunteering at different places and that opened a whole new world for her. Is there something you love to do? Something you always wanted to do? This just may be your chance…..
My youngest daughter just got married. She is almost 19. No, she is not pregnant. Far from it. Her and her husband are very much into the church and waited till marriage. They have know each other for 5 yrs. My daughter has had a couple of other ‘boyfriends’. I do believe they love each other and am truly happy for them. People all said I should not let her get married – uh, she is 18 and can legally do what she wants anyway and so that was a bad option. I also feel that you always, no matter what their age when the ‘leave the nest’ you just have to have faith and pray. She could not have married and had several boyfriends who broke her heart. I wouldn’t like that for her. This may last a lifetime, and if not, we will deal with it at that point. She finished high school early and took college classes and she is in college now and working. They are both very mature, bought a house, kudos to them saving that money!, and she lives less than a min from me. Why, then, am I so sad and feel so much loss. She is my only biological child, but my two step sons I have had since they were in diapers and they are 26 and 28, the oldest married w/a baby girl and the other still single. Is it because she is my last? My only little girl. I suffer depression. I am a disabled nurse. I know I need to get a hobby, but physically I can’t do a lot. Any suggestions for someone like me?
I really like this episode!!
I am still a kid though and after I watched this video, I feel like calling my mom… just to tell her that I love her and I appreciate every little thing she does!
sitemap | privacy | legal | contact us | website: j3studio.net
© 2017 Jen and Barb, Mom Life